3/15/2015

Relief

It's been a good while since my last post and a lot has happened. The reason behind my inactivity on this blog is twofold. Firstly, the past few years have been extremely hard on me and my family. More on that later, but secondly there really hasn't been all that much to share. I mean, a lot has happened and, sure, I have my own opinions on matters that are happening in the world of art, video games and wrestling and while I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinions I also believe that not every opinion should be publicly shared.

So what good is a blog for an introvert like myself, right? Well, sometimes something does happen and it's something I would like to share with those who would care to listen or read. And while I am an introverted person, when asked personal questions I'm an open book because I don't have anything to hide, I love providing whatever food for thought I can when it's requested and I don't particularly feel uneasy talking about things. But there's a venue for discussions relating to intimate and sensitive topics and I rarely feel a blog is the right place for it.

Despite all that I have a personal experience to share!

I met my wife in Vana'diel about 13 years ago. To this day we're still in touch with many friends from our Linkshell and a handful of marriages have resulted from it. Final Fantasy XI has had a profound and lasting influence on our lives and from its domestic inception was one of the greatest gaming experiences ever.

Tragically a few years after FFXI released, the girl who would become my wife lost her father, and went through the dissolution of her first marriage, all while trying to be the best first-time mother she could be, caring for her newly born baby boy. They came into my life when the baby was seven months old and I have been raising him along with his mother since. He is simultaneously our pride, our joy, an occasional pain in the butt, and we love him unconditionally.

Caring for the baby was a joy and I had plenty of practice. My mother has run a daycare since I was in Kindergarten and being the oldest of four boys, I helped my parents with my younger siblings growing up, so it was clockwork; feeding, burping, changing the diapers, cleaning the vomit. I was there for his first steps, and I was there when his first word brought a tear to my eye. "Dada!"

Six years later the beautiful baby is now a beautiful and bright child with a mouth we still have yet to find an off switch for. My wife and I are happily married at this point. Our son's home schooled by me because California schools are... well, I'd really rather not go there. With my wife and I tutoring him he is two grades ahead of his class. He's healthy, he's happy and he has so many people who love him and keep him entertained. Grandma, Grandpa, three uncles, great grandparents, several cousins once-removed, the dog, the cats, the rabbits, the fish and family friends, of course.

Our son's birth father decides he wants into the picture at this point and threatens there is no choice but to do things his way. His way involved sending our son across the continent to spend a couple weeks with him and his new wife and going through hours of therapy so a psychiatrist could help acclimate the child.

Our son's best interest is always our primary concern, as it is with all good parents. Our wants and needs come second to the well-being of our child. So we uprooted our home and had to move back to California in order to partake in this legal battle for adoption. Nearly three years later and here we are... Just last week, I was finally able to legally adopt my son. It's so very surreal... I mean, he's always been my son. In our family, among friends and our circle, he's ours. I literally can count on one hand how many times I've said Kiddo is my "stepson."

With it being legal there's finally piece of mind. The relentless stress and worry has started to fade and once the paperwork is done my wife and child can legally use our family surname as their own. Aside from that, though, life carries on just as it was before, with the big exception being without the fear of somebody threatening to try and take our son away from us. This is the first time I've shared my story and, for someone who bottles things up, it's a great relief to get all this out. Thank you!

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